I have been thinking a lot about cheating lately. It seems that at this point in my life a large number of my close friends relationships are in various but definite stages of, well... disarray. I think back to maybe 15 years ago when we were all getting married for the first time and how idealistic we were about marriage and relationships. I used to think there was nothing worse than cheating or being cheated on. I don't really feel that way anymore, there are many things that are indeed far worse. Don't get me wrong, it's bad and I am not condoning it but I get it, I see how it can happen. Just about everyone I know when I really sit sown and think about it has had cheating touch their relationship in some form or fashion over the years. It's pretty shocking. And those are just the ones I know about, who knows how many others there are who are really good at it and never get caught. I mean, clearly it happens right??? So what does this really mean? I didn't know until I separated from my ex that there are entire websites completely devoted to helping folks find an affair partner. A friend of mine actually suggested I go that route before I really committed to getting a divorce "just in case" Lol. She meant well, really she did!
In contemplating my future it doesn't really give me a lot of hope. A friend of mine got married 6 weeks ago after a 3 year relationship and informed me yesterday that he is in fact, miserable. WTF???? I knew he was making a mistake but no, he did not listen to me. I guarantee you if he stays married he will be cheating at some point. Another friend of mine who is going thru a 3rd...yes 3rd divorce is thinking about getting it on with her ex who is currently married to the woman he cheated on her with. I know you are probably thinking what kind of people does this girl hang out with??? This is exactly the point, these are normal, suburban, educated, employed, regular people. You would never know or suspect, at least I never would have until now.
So why does everyone cheat? Okay, I know it's not really everyone but why so many? Are they just that miserable, need excitement, hate their spouse, fallen out of love, no will power, sex addicts, met their soul mate, all of the above?? Can you put it back together if someone cheats? Can you eventually have a successful relationship with the person you cheated with, even though it started out totally shady? Hmmm... and what about poor Kristen Stewart? Will she be labeled a home wrecker forever? And who really cares anyway??? Lol. I didn't cheat on my ex but I get it. Totally.Maybe the real question I should be asking is why do so many people get married again and again and break their vows? I think I am just going to stay single for awhile. No, I am... for sure. Or at least until I find my next soul mate ha ha.