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Weekend Update & A Link UP

Monday, March 31, 2014
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Hey there party people! How was every body's weekend? Mine was pretty uneventful which was fine by me. I can't go out every weekend or I will spend all the monies I have because I have no will power. So I figure, buy big bottle or box O' wine on Friday night , rent a couple of red box movies and call it a weekend. Maybe throw in a grilled cheese here and there for sustenance. BOOM! Perfect weekend! See...

But this is not my food pic for my weekly Picture Practice link up with Kelli. That was a little more thoughtful. Since this weeks subject matter was food I figured I would post a little snap of  the most perfect crock pot creation I made this week thanks to a big sale at Kroger. On Thursday I had  a Boston Butt in the crock pot for about 10 hours in a lime chipotle bbq pool of goodness. Really this recipe is fool proof and if anyone wants it I will share it in a separate post (to avoid linking to a picture of my hair by mistake this time).
So it turned out really good and I will be eating off of it for days I am sure but that's ok. I really had two favorite food pics this weekend so this was hard to choose from but I'll start with how I "re-purposed" my roast for lunch on Saturday... as a baked potato topping and it was deelicious! And I snapped this pic and it really looks like i had a food stylist in my kitchen... I think anyway.

And it pretty much tasted as good as it looked. Like I almost licked the plate clean good. 

But I snapped this pic too when I was shredding up the meat and I just thought it looked cool. Just one perfect little bite on a fork. 

These last two are no filters and just with my Galaxy S4 Camera phone but I seriously love this phone. It takes great pics!!!

So that's it for me today. Please join me for my first I Don't Give a F*** Link Up tomorrow. We shall see if I did it all correctly and let's just hope it works. 

The Rules are no rules. It's gonna be a  first of the month thing and I think this is a good time to just say IDGAF about whatever you want. So Link Up tomorrow and give me a shout! Grab the button! Tell me what you really do not give two f**** about:)

The Crazy Wise Woman

Fun Things For Friday

Friday, March 28, 2014

Soooo look what I learned how to do!!!! I am so proud of myself. I got a copy of Photoshop Elements from a work pal and I am learning how to use it. It was painfully slow at first but once I found a super easy tutorial online I was Gone With the Wind fabulous. 

Well sort of. I got tired and decided not to continue to curse the add text function any longer and give up on the numbering and words. All it would give me was a flat line... no text. MoFo. I wanted to add some links too but again... RAGE it didn't work...  and old lady needs some sleep. I'll get better at cleaning this shit up and make it look purdier soon I promise. 

So let me run around this little collage/mood board /Etsy wishlist of mine. Lets take it clockwise from the top with me Purple And Gold Antlers because antlers are cool and if you live in the south you need some. My hunting guy pals will not appreciate these but I do. And mine is the only opinion that matters. Moving on... I collect teacups, fancy girly teacups. I also drink barrels full of wine. Perhaps I should try Wine in a Teacup? Sure, why not! Ear cuffs are kinda hot and I like anything with a bow on it. A beautiful vintage gold bar cart similar to this is something I would like to have in my next home. Because it will likely be roughly the size of a shoebox... a shoebox with a fabulous bar cart. A Britney Work Bitch coffee mug. I just need one. A summer flask. I think you should have seasonal  and occasion appropriate containers in which to hide your alcohol. An Octopus flask just screams summer and begs to be filled with grapefruit vodka. Dontcha think? A glittery Chevron Burlap Envelope Clutch because I am really loving the whole clutch thing that has been going on for awhile. Plus it forces me to give my arm a break and ditch my ginormo tote bags once in awhile. And last but not least the cute little I Am le Tired print. Cause I am but  it makes me happy to look at pretty things on my walls. 

Please do not judge me too harshly on my pitiful Photoshop Skills. But that was fun!

Now... let's get our #backthatazzup on with my hummus guzzling gal pal, Miss Whitney. And if you don't know this song yet get out from under that rock and dance your pants off with me to Betty Who!

Betty Who - Somebody Loves You by Betty Who on Grooveshark

Happy Weekend!

The Stages of Crazy

Thursday, March 27, 2014
"Go insane, Go insane. Throw some GLITTER, Make it rain." - Ke$ha

Have you ever hear of the 5 stages of Crazy? Yeah.. me neither.

How about Grief? ... here they are

Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression & Acceptance... jeesus no thanks

Turns out there are stages for death, labor, cancer, divorce, relationships, love, break up...and I'm sure many more because we humans like that sort of thing. Knowing that what we are going thru is "normal" and someone has gone before us makes us feel O.K. during the times in our lives when we are feeling most definitely not O.K. 

But What about Crazy?

Are there stages for that? I'm not talking about real, need medication, men in little white coats crazy. I'm talking about the kind of crazy you experience when your life takes a turn you didn't plan for... never saw coming. The shit that throws you for a loop and sucker punches you in the stomach. The big stuff that changes your course... forever. The little stuff that can sometimes have a ripple effect and end up becoming big stuff. No one can prepare you for that. At least most of the people I talk to say really not helpful things like "Girl... I don't know what to tell ya... I just can't imagine. Bless Ur Heart (aka you stupid fuck)" Because we all have our shit and we can empathize and sympathize to a certain extent but sometimes we all end up in the same but uniquely different personal stage of crazy. 

I think I know what a few of those stages are and I might could expand upon them at some point but the one I'm most fixated on right now is where I'm at... IDGAF.

MORE than just an abbreviation for "I Dont Give A Fuck." IDGAF is an attitude..a brazen spirit...A state of mind..

To be IDGAF is to have high energy that's legit, charismatic and ultimately, positive in every way. In no way is it negative, as long as it is used with moderation and consideration of the environment. (for example being sexually assertive idgaf on a first date may not be the best idea, unless you know she's into it ;)

IDGAF-ery is a common trait among ballers, musicians, pimps, sensual lovers, dancers and MLBCs.
Nick: "c'mon John, this is the last bus that gets us across town, I'm not gonna rap and break dance down the bus aisle while you be droppin' beats...we'll get all kinds of annoyed responses and probably get us kicked off."

John: "hey man, IDGAF!!! No worries."

Ok so that's the Urban Dictionary definition of IDGAF and ya'll know how much I like the Urban Dictionary. It's not a negative thing at all, it's just something we all go thru... with work, family, relationships, body image, food, alcohol, money. You name it, on any given day you just might not give a flying fuck about something and if so... come sit by me. Cause I  am right there with ya and I am pretty sure I will be there for a minute or two.

Soooo I am thinking this needs to be my first link up opportunity. What do you guys think? Not sure about all of the deetz yet but I just need someone to tell me how to make a "go insane throw some glitter make it rain button" and we can IDGAF on the weekly... maybe?

I ...IDGAF on the daily so this won't be problematic for me but for some of you this might be a way to vent and release with no judgement and all of us here to validate your IDGAF-ery.  Anything goes... IDGAF on your Grandma I don't care... but try not to cause I dig old people. Other than that...go for it!

Cause I am here to say it's really ok to say IDGAF now and then... but don't take my word for it. Just do yourself a a favor, try everything once and know that sometimes it's ok not to know.

You only get one time on this planet.

"Crazy Kids" - Ke$ha

We are who we are,

Little Friday

My Peek User Review & Humpday Confessions

Wednesday, March 26, 2014

So I took some advice from Katie at He Calls Me Grace this week and did something really  super scary. I asked someone to review my blog for me. A perfect stranger. Peek is a  website that offers you an opportunity to have someone random review your website and evaluate it on different aspects completely free of charge. How cool is that??? Let me tell you about my experience and if you dare after you hear what I have to say you can take the plunge and click here.

First off when I read about this I thought well, I want to grow this thing so might as well hear some cold hard facts. And it was not horrible. My reviewer was a guy and he was actually very honest, constructive and helpful in his review. I am glad we weren't in the same room watching the review because I spent the whole time yelling thinking "doh... don't click don't that one" or "no,no,no... you don't want that post". But it was all good in the end. The truth is I know that there are some things in my blog that I want and need to change as far as content and user friendliness goes. Content... really. When I started the blog I didn't have a clue and I kinda still don't but... ***CONFESSION***... I have been stalking the shee-ahhht out of a lot of you and I am stealing all of your best ideas. Not really,  but I may reach out to  some of my favorite ladies in blog land and pick your brains. I really want to know what works for you and I don't think we need to re-invent the wheel here... because I am one lazy mo-fo and I think if you want to be the best, learn from the best. But afterward I will buy you dinner and/or a glass of wine cause I'm classy like that!

One of the fun things was hearing what he liked about my blog (insert my stupid shit eating Sally Field face here)... he likes me, he likes me! And he said I looked half my age.... hold on while I do my old hag happy dance ....

Overall it was a great experience and I can definitely see my blog from the perspective of a first time visitor. I see how important linking things correctly is. Ombre hair pics on a recipe link... duh what the hell Amy... I wanted to die laughing at the guy  reading that post?? I mean I see where I was going with certain things but I think on the blog you need to pretty much go in a straight line or people will just go somewhere else.  So I am going to work on it fix the shit that's broken and sign up for another one! Someone please tell me how to design my own blog cause I can't afford to pay for these things on my single mom budget. But I can learn!! If you design your own, how did you learn? Was it hard?

Thanks Mr. Peek Reviewer!

Oh and if you are a lil curious have a look...

My Video Review

And if you decide to try Peek let me know how it goes for you!

Linking up with Kathy for another Humpday Confessions and here's a little dumb ass humor for ya...

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I Puffy Heart Felons!

Tuesday, March 25, 2014

And D.J.'s and rappers and reality stars. I swore to God I wouldn't do it. That almost felt like something I've never said before. I got sucked into to another Bravo reality show thanks to the genius that is Andy Cohen. Southern Charm has captured my ... attention...  like a Kim K belfie. Dat ass... I mean come on... it's hard to look away!!! And this little peek into the lives of the rich and not so charming  "southern gentlemen" of Charleston is like that too. I want to not watch but I'm watching  because I want to see what really passes for a "true southern gentleman" in places where folks have more money than they have brain cells... possibly due to inbreeding... not sure. Shep and Thomas already admitted to being distantly related cousins of the Boykin clan, soooo just sayin. 

Let me just run it down for ya if you haven't been watching. 

First off there is Thomas J. Ravenal or "T-Rav" as his polo playing chums like to call him. T-Rav is a 50 year old former politician who got convicted for "possessing" a large amount of cocaine... hello felon. Now this is funny because if he weren't T-Rav he may have gotten an "intent to do something with" charge thrown in there too but... there is a bridge named after his father. I don't want to like him but I kinda do. He admits to being a little fucked up which makes me want to get drunk with him and hang out on a plantation or something. 

T-Rav also has a polo field and a penchant for 21 year old girls who sleep around.  Woo hoo let's ride!!! Wait a minute I'm way too old for him. Washed up at 43... le sigh. 

Next up... Jenna King. I know she's not a guy but she's kind of interesting like the guys on the show in that Jenna just don't give a fuck. She shaves her head and wears 6 inch Louboutins at home, a million dolla downtown Charleston landmark that is paid for by her 50 something year old boyfriend Lou who lives in New York. Go Jenna!!! You are my hero. Oh and according to last night's episode she never neglects the balls and she has a "crystal meth vagina". Can we trade places Jenna?

And then we have the cantankerous but precious Whitney Sudler-Smith. Here he is ringing the dinner bell (swear to Christ) for his servant to bring him and his Mommy a fried chicken dinner... FRIED CHICKEN. Oh no you did not Bravo.Whitney is a grown man with a douche-y hyphenated name who lives with his Mom. I'm not sure I need to say anything else but I will. He claims to like girls but I am 90% positive that 100% of the time he prefers penis. I feel that kinship with him.

And let's end it on a positive note. Meet Shepherd Rose aka "Shep" because what else would you call a guy like this. Idk maybe Schlep? Shep doesn't work. He surfs all day and does a lot of day drinking too. He claims to have never had a problem with the ladies but the only one he can get so far is the one T-Rav already knocked the bottom out of. Step it up Shep. Maybe it's your pants.  He always looks a little messy, borderline homeless actually but considering he lives in his parents house I guess this is somewhat true? He is a descendant of the Boykin family and they have a spaniel named after them. I see where he is kind of spaniel-ish. My dog is a hound be he does this all day long too. Like I said... livin the dream Shep. 

The other 2 cast members are pretty boring thus far so not really worthy of my colorful descriptions yet but there is always the reunion show... or Season 2.

Damn you Andy Cohen, you got me again!

I think I need a mint julep or something now. 

Here's to gettin into the cups!

Pink it's not even a question....

Monday, March 24, 2014

What a busy weekend we had, why oh why can weekends not be 3 days... I would gladly work four 10 hour days in exchange for one extra day of weekend.  And if you follow me on IG I apologize cause it was a bit much at least it felt like it to me. But I must photo errr-ting... it's a sick twisted addiction. And just because I consider myself a lifestyle blogger let's make no mistake... I am not trying to tell you how to live. Or set any sort of example as to how to live. Because if I was, this weekend the takeaway would have been guzzle boxed wine, eat pancakes and make big cupcakes with pink frosting. Oh and also drink beer, eat pizza and convince yourself and your friends that "appetizer" is in fact a food group. 

My littlest girl has a BFF and her BFF's mom is my BFF so we are pretty much together 24/7 when there is any sort of holiday or bday shenanigans gong on which there was this weekend. See here....

Sorry this is a little random but I am seriously sleep deprived, I am going to work on that tonight. And just for shits and giggles I am linking up with Kelli over at She Crab Soup for some fun picture practice. Cause obvi, one can never take enough pics. The theme this week is water... I added glitter cause water can be a little ho hum. Except when you are hung way over then water is pretty much like nectar of the God's. And everything is better with glitter!

If anyone needs me I'll just be over here drinking water out of a glittered up mason jar.


Breathe...just Breathe

Friday, March 21, 2014

I cried at work yesterday. Cried. At work. I don't do that. But I did and ugh.... then people  offered me money.

Either they were feeling really sorry for me or it was just so awful that they were willing to pay me to stop. Maybe I'm onto something here...jeenyus??? Nahhh... slightly overly emotional and at times uncontrollably feeling sorry for myself ... Yes. I did not take the money either.

In case you are wondering why I was crying at work, things like exploding water heaters gushing water uncontrollably at 7:00 in the morning tend to have that affect on me. There's a lot of things in my house that are slightly broken, and this week they all broke completely. Amy don't do broken expensive shit well. This makes me want to stick my head in a paper bag, breathe and throw up simultaneously. And then cry some more. I did manage to get one thing fixed yesterday... the hot water heater. So we don't have to run to quik trip to pee today. Praiseallujah!!!! Annnnnnd..... My ex actually came thru after he made me lose my shit at work. So on the motherfuckerometer he redeemed a few points at the end there. He basically found someone to buy the shit I needed and help him install it. Said someone whom I will have to pay back but.... I'm not riding on the complain train today. I have hot water. It is heaven on earth.

In other news I just bought Zac Brown Band tickets for me and my daughter. I just might be the coolest mom ever to walk the face of the planet Earth. And before you go get all Judgey McJudgerson on my ass because yes, I am still broker than broke.... I decided awhile back that bills or not I was gonna keep making memories. Because there are no guarantees here folks. I realize that I have tons of responsibilities financially that I need to be taking better care of and I am. There are lots of things that I don't do with my money anymore. There are lots of things I have given up completely, but I am not giving up the occasional dinner out, concert or even a short, cheap weekend jaunt with the kids to a football game or the beach. Those are times we get to just be together and enjoy each other. And who really knows how many of those opportunities you get??? I am 43 years old and I will never forget going to see Jimmy Buffett with my Dad when I was about 17. It was just me and him cause he was a parrot head before it was cool to be a parrot head. We sat on the lawn and he drank beer and we did "Fins"  and sang "Volcano" at the top of our lungs. And I will never forget that night. And that's the point.

Funny thing... after all my tears and agida yesterday everything turned out ok. My world didn't come crashing down around me even though it kind of felt like it might. I took a deep breath and said "ok well let's see how this shakes out" and it did... satisfactorily. Money is money and things are just things. At the end of my days I likely will not be thinking about the day my hot water heater essssploded and I cried at work.

But I might think about sitting on the lawn, drinkin a cold beer and  watching Zac Brown with Olivia and belting out "Toes".

So on that note... let's #backthatazzup with Whitney and go make some memories this weekend!

Toes by Zac Brown Band on Grooveshark

It's Little Friday Link Up Time!!!

Thursday, March 20, 2014

Little Friday.... hmmmm can I just skip this day altogether??? Why you ask? Well, yesterday my garage door opener broke, just broke. Then my oven died... deader than a doornail. Last night I couldn't sleep cause I might be just a tad stressed... I don't know maybe just a little so I got up at 3 a.m. to take a hot shower. Sometimes that's the only thing that works.  Bad idea... very very bad.

I woke up this morning to a hot water heater gushing water into my garage (and subsequently the basement below). I am trying extremely hard not to burst into hysterical ugly cry cause I can't afford to fix any of this. No really! How many days do you think 4 people can live in a house with no running water? Or maybe just ice cold running water?

If I make it thru this day without killing my ex-douchebag someone, bawling my eyes out again, throwing myself off a bridge/cliff/barstool, drinking wine until I pass out and need a cold shower or selling my soul to the devil in exchange for a break I will be back tomorrow. But right now I am off for a hot date with a plumber referred to me by a friend... and he happens to be single. Even in my moments of despair my friends are still trying to set me up. I'm not sure I'm in the mood.

Universe you are really pissing me off today. Thank God I showered last night.

See ya on the flip side I hope!

The Grits Blog

I Cant Wait for Summer Because

Wednesday, March 19, 2014
Summer is really not my most favorite season... there I said it. People always gasp in horror but it's true. I live in the deep south and well.. it's hot as a whorehouse on nickel night here during the summer and I don't like it one bit... the heat that is. But there are a lot of things I do love about summer, the things that if we experienced in any other season just wouldn't translate or be nearly as wonderful. Stuff like....

Beer - Icy cold deliciousness... It's just so good when it touches you lips. My fave.

Mason Jar Drinks... Anything goes here and they travel well and look cute. Like Sangria fro example. Make em ahead and pack a ton for you and your boy/girlfriends the next day at the lake or the pool, or the deck.

Outdoor Concerts... is there anything better than outdoor music venues? No... the answer is No. I almost never go to arena's anymore cause it just blows in comparison. This summer I have Zac Brown Band, Luke Bryan and Keith Urban coming to my town and my 2 fave outdoor venues. I shit you not and I am about to bust something I'm so excited.  I'm going to all three.

Flip Flops.. The $2 dollar kind... in every color.

Grillin - Cause I don't care what it is, if it's summer you should grill it. End of story.

Layered Salads... You know the kind that are at every summer barbecue you go to and are just like a total party in your mouth... plus they all have bacon.

I love being Tan... I know I know I know... it's bad for you but God Dammit it just looks so good!!!

So even though pretty soon it'll be hotter than a billy goat's ass in a pepper patch.... I guess in my world with enough alcohol, good music, delicious food, cute accessories and a tan I be A'ight!
Linking up with Tay and Helene today because it seemed like a good idea!

Helene In Between

What's you favorite thing about summer? Spill....

Stretchin' Them Doll Hairz

Tuesday, March 18, 2014
So everyone knows it ain't easy being a single parent. The struggle is real! Especially when you have a deadbeat ex and you don't make a zillion dollars or anything even close. I am constantly looking for ways to make every dollar I earn go as far as humanly possible. And I am going to be the first to admit I am not that good at it on the one hand... cause I have Champs taste on a PBR budget. And it's really fucking hard to never ever have enough money when you used to always have more than enough. Or at least  large amounts of credit like everyone else to make it look like we had more than enough. Sorry... it's the sad truth of a lot of the middle class at least where I live in suburban Atlanta.

Any who I have lots of ways now that I have figured out how to save money and cut corners. And maybe it's a little dorky but I get a huge cheapskate boner when I can actually make some dinero go a little farther than typical. My favorite way to do that is with food. Specifically home made food that is pretty, healthy and delicious. We don't eat out a lot because I like to cook and I'm damn good at it. So last night I made a super yummy and completely home made meal based on an idea I stole from my BFF. I just tweaked it a little to make it a little more fancy pants cause I'm a foodie and I eat with my eyes first.

Mini Chicken Sliders with Sauteed Mushrooms & Feta

So to start I bought 3 boneless skinless chicken breasts cause they were on sale and split them so I had 6 breast halves. Slice those chicky boobies up into little medallions so you end up with about 4 pieces out of each breast half. BOOM... that's 24 cute little pieces of meat for about $7.00.  Here's about how it all shakes out...

  • Marinate those little chicken medallions in whatever you like, I did Cavender's cause I'm an addict and  Kraft Zesty Italian dressing cause who doesn't like that?
  • Saute your shrooms in whatever strikes your fancy or use onions or veggies if you are not a mushroom fan. I like mushrooms in EVOO, Worcestershire, Garlic powder and Kitchen Bouquet (my favorite secret weapon for browning things up and making them purrrrdy and if you don't know what this is look it up and you can thank me later)
  • Get some slider rolls  and slice them up
  • Crumble a little Feta... again any/ALL cheese is good cheese... blue  with a little Frank's Red Hot would be the bomb as well 
  • Put it all together and add a pickle... I always like to add a pickle... a biggin... kidding kidding kidding, not really. I have a neighbor that gives me bunches of home made pickles every year... the best. 
  • We had some strawberries with it cause one of the pluses of having no mans around is no one gives two and a half shits what we have on the side. Might be a veggie, might be a rice krispie treat. We just don't care.  
  • I froze half the chicken for later and we still have plenty of leftovers for lunch or another whole dinner tomorrow for at least a couple of us! Win.. win

So that is pretty much where all my money saving talents lie, in the kitchen and the grocery store. I know without a doubt that I can save decent amounts of money just by cooking and preparing our food and not eating out as a family. Sure....we order the occasional pizza or splurge on cheap breakfast out but that's about it.

How do you save money? Cause I am really not good at this stuff. Those extreme couponer people are like from another planet. I don't know how they do that shit. And what do they do with 50 boxes of rice a roni? Or a hundred bottles of ketchup? But seriously....  Give me all of your tips and tricks and favorite ways to cheat the man and/or work the system if ya got em... ethically of course!